I'm Smiling Wide :D

I had the time of my life in India! Words truly cant express how I feel. Cant wait to go back there again. With you there, you really treated me like a princess and you made that strange place feel so much like home for me. Thanks for everything! Well, Im glad Im back. So much has happened and I just feel really fresh. I missed everyone and everything back here! I love you all who missed me! I missed you too! Well cant wait to rock so rock on with me will you?

I'm Smiling Wide

I have gone through alot this year and now having you makes things much easier. Well, I still miss you Pa. No one would ever be able to replace you. Other than that I cant be bothered by those ignorant individuals. As I always say, you want me come get me. I'm happy. I dont regret anything so I'm just living life. You wanna join my carefree life? :D

Let it be a secret

Well, finals over which gives time to rephrase, indulge in silence and just live my life. Loving everything and everyone in it now. Glad to say time is passing its going to 8 months and I'm still standing so I'm surviving. So going to miss her when she's not here. I hope she has a great time and just do what she loves the most. Love you so much you know? Thats all for now before I know it school's going to be over and I'm going to be away for a while. Cant wait for that.

Loved me yesterday, Love me today, Love me tomorrow, Dont let it end.

Happy Birthday Joey!

Dear Miss J, I just want to let you know how would just love to say Happy Birthday! Oh my you're getting older, haha :P I would like to say that I'm so glad I have you here with me :) Thanks for everything Miss J. Love you and I'll always be your Manja!

Just words from the heart nothing more

Hold me tight in the rain
Kiss my cheeks and say you'll stay
Baby dont you go away
Baby baby please stay...

Baby could you hold my hand please
Baby could you stay right here
Baby could you promise you wont leave
Baby baby just stay...

Baby do you know how much I need you
Baby do you know how much I love you
Baby cant you see that I want you
Baby baby just stay..

Hold me tight in the rain
Kiss my cheeks and say you'll stay
Baby dont you go away
Baby baby please stay
Please stay, please stay
Please stay.....

Thought of sharing this so here it is. But anyway this is just something I wrote. This is to all I lov e, adore, care and just cant live without. You want more come get me ok? :p

Just Can't Wait

Mum' s not at home and hope she's having fun. Can't wait for the weekends heading down to genting. Can't wait for november for many reasons. Can't wait to see your face when you see me.
Can't wait to get over all this. Can't wait for next year to get over the other big event and planning to take off to an island after spm. That will be a total blast if I really could really go there. Can't wait for tomorrow got to settle those things. Can't wait for ma to come home, need her cooking! My cooking sucks! :P Thats all for now. You have to wait til I speak again. Bye.

Flatter Me

Miss J thank you for doing this =D... I'm really tired today yet I'm still awake. The homework pile is still there and it has to be done. I had a great day and looking forward for tomorrow. I'm so glad camp's cancelled. I got a whole list of things to do tomorrow so hope it all goes well. That's all from me now.

I'm not loving its just something else, you'll get it when the time is right.

A little thought thats all...

I stumbled onto these interesting lines and thought it would be nice to share. So, enjoy..
Some of the unrefusable facts of today's world:
Today we have bigger houses but smaller families,
More degrees yet less common sense,
Advanced medicines but poor health,
Touched moon but no contact with our neighbours,
High income yet less peace of mind,
Free messages but no intention to send a single one,
Don't wait for any special occassion,
Make every moment of life enjoyable,
Love your family, friends, neighbours...

I totally agree with these lines

Enjoying Every Moment

Things are going fine and I'm pretty pleased with life. I'm enjoying the book I'm reading now. Can't wait for the hols to see what's in store for me. I'm still waiting for the 19th and wish time could just stop. I'm loving everything about now and can't wait for tomorrow. You're really just spicing up my life now. I like it since you're here more often now. I still miss you..

Just Another Ordinary Day

It's been some time since last blogged. I've been really busy. Had a nice and pleasant day today went out with mum. Just a little relaxing time. Got to start on many things hope it all goes well. In a way I am awaiting for 19th and in a way I'm not. I guess I'll just have to wait and see. Thats all for now and still miss you.

This Is Not A Fairytale

I am a dreamer. I wont deny. I am naive at times. I want chances. I hold on and days drag on for me. I want happy endings in everything. I'm definitely not a princess in a fairytale and I'm aware of that. Its always been hard to catch me or hold on to me. Its even harder now so dont bother trying. I've been spending my time thinking about things which had no end and now I know its not worth all that after all. I'm lucky to have realised it now before its practically too late. I speak my mind. So, I'm not living a fairytale. I'll make the best of the days I have here. Others can share it if they wish to but if not solitary moments are what I like and love for now.

I've changed and I dont regret. So, too bad. You've lost me and I'm sorry.

Me and my skipping heart! No doubt to that. I'm enjoying every moment of life. As I'm enjoying anyone cares to join me? You sure know where to find me.Thats all from me now..

PS: I have no regrets :P

I've not gone anywhere

I guess things have changed and in no time the 5th month is going to pass. I still feel same. Same tears and feelings. I guess some things are meant to change but some are just meant to stay the same. I am clueless at times but I feel a sense of change in me. Maybe its just this mixture of emotions stirring in me. But I am living my life. Can't wait to be free. I'm just enjoying every moment alone. The moments where I can only hear my voice and nothing else comes in my way. Just me and only me. I don't regret what I've done and said. I got 1 life and no other and I'm not going to waste it. You want me, come get me. I'm not going to be waiting here forever so make your move. They are those moments which I still hate but things seem brighter. I'm getting older and I am changing not for anyone but me. My life has now evolved around myself and I'm happy it has. I'm still missing you like crazy and no one is ever going to replace you and no one has. You filled those empty holes. Now you make me wonder, who is going to help me fill those holes? I wonder. But on the bright side I will always have me and me. I will always have you in my thoughts, forever.

You decide the rest and I'm not making any moves ok?

Will You Be There?

This video is simply amazing! I love the background choir and the lyrics is absolutely wonderful. Not forgetting Michael Jackson, What more can I say when the whole world says his great! I love the last part when MJ speaks. His words are full of meaning. I love you MJ!

Pa I know you loved him and because of you I love him even more!

A Tribute

A little tribute to Michael Jackson. One wonderful, extraodinary, and unique individual. The world's just lost one talented soul. My favourite songs of his are you are not alone, man in the mirror, beat it, heal the world and his famous moon walk! No one will be able to do that believe me....RIP Michael Jackson!

Will definitely miss you!

I'm missing you like mad

First time without you. No one's really replaced you. Your place in my heart is permanent. Everyday reminds me of you. I hope I've made you proud. I'm changing to the better now. More matured than you think. I just wish you were here. You would know what to say for this present moment. But, I don't know if you know but I love you with all my heart. You may not be here but you're in my thoughts. Happy Father's Day Pa! Love you always.

I will always be your baby girl

Things Definitely Changes

Doing and done alot of cleaning. Got rid of many things. I guess its just a start of moving on. Its hard letting go so much but I guess there comes a point when you just have to let go. The place I call home is now much cleaner I guess. That's definitely a relieve. I'm glad that life's going pretty well. Forgetting those flaws but I'm living my life. I'm smiling now and ready for tomorrow. So much of tomorrow, I'm going to school. I hope Mrs R is in a good and pleasant mood. I'm not going to get intimidated by anyone that's pledge for now.

I'm sick of this but I seriously have no time

Words

Words I've not spoken has now become even more harder to express. I've changed I dont deny that. I've become even more speechless for some reason. I still miss you by the way. I'm glad things are better now. I still wish it could be better. I guess I would never be satisfied. But I know I'm living my life to the fullest. Can;t be bothered any longer. I only got 1 life to prove myself so here I stand. I've realised life isn't that bad after all. I may feel that way at times but I know my way now. I know where I'm heading to. 1 goal for my this life of mine. I'm satisfied in many ways today I can say. I'm starting anew. I'm changing even more. I guess its time I did. But, I'm still here. I'm still who I am.

Signing off with lots of love, Manjira

Makes Me Recall How Things Use To Be

You tucked me in, turned out the light
Kept me safe and sound at night
Little girls depend on things like that
Brushed my teeth and combed my hair
Had to drive me everywhere
You were always there when I looked back
You had to do it all alone
Make a living, make a home
Must have been as hard as it could be
And when I couldn't sleep at night
Scared things wouldn't turn out right
You would hold my hand and sing to me
Caterpillar in the tree
How you wonder who you'll be
Can't go far but you can always dream
Wish you may and wish you might
Don't you worry, hold on tight
I promise you there will come a day
Butterfly fly away
Butterfly fly away, butterfly fly away
Flap your wings now you can't stay
Take those dreams and make them all come true
Butterfly fly away, butterfly fly away
We've been waiting for this day
All along and knowing just what to do
Butterfly, butterfly, butterfly, butterfly fly away
Butterfly fly away
Butterfly fly away

I'm missing you even more now

I'm Moving My Feet....Yay!

Pop it, lock it, polka dot it
Country fivin' hip hop hip
Put your arms in the sky, move side to side
Jump to the left, stick it, glide

Zig zag cross the floor
Shuffle in diagonal
When the drums hits hands on your hips
One footed 180 twist

And then a zig zag, step, slide
Lean in left, clap three times
Shake it out, head to toe
Throw it all together, that's how we roll.

It's a song by the way and I can feel the beat of the drums in my ears now

Just Don't Leave Me Alright?

The little things, you do to me are taking me over,
i wanna show ya everything inside
me all like a nervous heart crazy beating
my feet are stuck here,
against the pavement
i wanna break free,
i wanna make it
closer to your eyes,
get your attention
before you pass me by
So back up back up take another chance
Don’t you mess up mess up I don’t wanna lose you
Wake up wake up this aint just a thing that you
Give up give up don’t you say that I’d be Better off
better off, sleepin by myself and wonderin
If im better off better off, with out you boy
So don't just leave me hanging on
And every time, you notice me by
holdin me closely, and sayin sweet things
i don't believe, that it could be you speekin your mind and,
sayin the real thing
my feet have broke free, and i am leavin
i'm not gonna stand here, feelin lonely but
i wont forget you, and i won't think this
was just a waste of time
So back up back up take another chance
Don’t you mess up mess up I don’t wanna lose you
Wake up wake up this aint just a thing that you
Give up give up don’t you say that I’d be
Better off better off, sleepin by myself and wonderin
If im better off better off, with out you boy
But don't just leave me hangin on

Just thinking of a mysterious guy

midnight bottle

Midnight bottle take me come with me my memories and everything come back to me
Midnight bottle make it real what feels like make believe so I can see a little more clearly
Like every single move you make kissing me so carefully on the corners of my dreaming eyes
I’ve got a midnight bottle gonna drink it down
A one way ticket takes me to the times we had before
When everything felt so right If only for tonight I’ve got a midnight bottle gonna ease my pain
From all these feelings driving me insane
When I’m with you and everything’s all right if only for tonight
Got a midnight bottle drifting off into the candlelight where I can find you in your timeA midnight bottle I forgot how good it felt to be in a dream just like you had me
Cuz lately I’ve been stumbling feels like I’m recovering
But I think it’s only for tonight
I’ve got a midnight bottle gonna drink it down A one way ticket takes me to the times we had beforeWhen everything felt so right
If only for tonight I’ve got a midnight bottle gonna ease my pain
From all these feelings driving me insane
When I’m with you and everything’s all right if only for tonight
If only for tonight, if only for tonight, if only for tonight
I’ve got a midnight bottle gonna drink it down
A one way ticket takes me to the times we had before
When everything felt so right
If only for tonight I’ve got a midnight bottle gonna ease my pain
From all these feelings driving me insane
When I’m with you and everything’s all right if only for tonight
If only for tonight, if only for tonight, if only for tonight

Just feel so relaxed now

My Expectations

I thought of things to expect in the near future,
But I guess too much of imagination,
Living life with no expectations is much better.
But anyway birthday is coming up can't seem to think about it at all.
I guess not expecting much this year.
But I'll wait and see...:p

I'm getting older

Just One More Time Can I?

Making my way downtown
Walking fast Faces passed
And I'm home bound
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making my way Through the crowd
And I need you And I miss you And now I wonder....
If I could fall Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass me by
'Cause you know
I'd walk A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you Tonight
It's always times like these
When I think of you
And I wonder If you ever
Think of me 'Cause everything's so wrong
And I don't belong
Living in your Precious memories '
Cause I need you And I miss you And now I wonder....
If I could fall Into the sky
Do you think time Would pass me by
'Cause you know
I'd walk A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you Tonight And I,
I Don't want to let you know I,
I Drown in your memory I,
I Don't want to let this go I,
I Don't.... Making my way downtown
Walking fast Faces passed
And I'm home bound
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way Making my way Through the crowd
And I still need you And I still miss you And now I wonder....
If I could fall Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass us by 'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you...
If I could fall Into the sky
Do you think time Would pass me by
'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you
If I could Just hold you Tonight

I'm missing you so much

The Past Will Always Remain The Past

I guess words cant express true feelings. How much my heart may yearn today and to hear your voice one more time. Never told all this before but now I guess its time. I put a mask on hiding the truth from the world. You were my world yet no one realised. Why am I saying all this now? I guess there's no harm in telling the truth right? I've waited long enough. I'm still fragile. Still young. There will never be another soul like you in my life. Even if I walk every corner of this planet I wont find what I'm looking for. The truth hurts and I just cant get it out of myself. Its killing inside. Even now, these words are nothing but the deep truth from my heart's core and nothing else. I guess I can move on without regretting. But how can I move on when I couldnt even hear his voice during his last days of life? I miss him. I miss coming back and seeing him sitting on his bed waiting for me. I miss his scent. I miss his touch. I miss those rides we had together. Cant I have another day with you? Just you and me. I'll always be my daddy's girl. I dreamed of my future with you by me in each step I take. I guess life's full of setbacks. I'll always remember you and I wish people could understand how much I'm affected now. I hope people will know how fragile I am now and excuse me. Be with me and there's still hope even without you. I just hope people do. Today, Tomorrow and Always you will always be my favourite.

I've realised how much I need you.

Dear Friend

Happy Birthday Stephanie!

Hope you have a great birthday ahead and enjoy yourself to the max! :P Don't ever change! Happy 16th birthday and I know you'll always be 16 days older than me! Haha!

Crazy

My New Companions

These are my little babies for now. The one on the top is my baby girl and the one down is my baby boy. Are'nt they cute? Just like the owner! Haha! :P But anyways cant wait to see them grow as both still young. Both quite cheeky and naughty. But so adorable...Alright thats all about my darlings for now. Maybe some other time will show the other sides of these innocent faces.

Love, Manjira.

Best Experiences

T h e Be s t M o me n t s I n L i f e
1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing till your stomach hurts.
3. Enjoying a ride down the country side.
4. Listening to your favorite song on the radio.
5. Going to sleep listening to the rain pouring outside.
6. Getting out of the shower and wrapping yourself with a warm, fuzzy towel.
7. Passing your final exams with good grades.
8. Being a part of an interesting conversation.
9. Finding some money in some old pants.
10. Laughing at yourself.
11. Sharing a wonderful dinner with all your friends.
12. Laughing without a reason.
13. "Accidentally" hearing someone say somthing good about you.
14. Watching the sunset.
15. Listening to a song that reminds you of an important person in your life.
16. Receiving or giving your first kiss.
17. Feeling this buzz in your body when seeing this "special" someone.
18. Having a great time with your friends.
19. Seeing the one you love happy.
20. Wearing the shirt of a person you love and smelling his/her perfume.
21. Visiting an old friend of yours and remembering great memories.
22. Hearing someone telling you "I LOVE YOU" & ABOVE ALL - REACHING THE TARGET SET BY YOU.......... ...WE ALL.....
"True friends come in the good times when we tell them to, and come in the bad times.....without calling."

On My Side, I Know.

It's getting cold, I've got my big coat on, I know I hear your laugh and I look up smiling at you. I hug your legs and fall asleep. I know you're not scared of anything at all. I know I'm laughing on the car ride home with you. I know you were on my side even when I was wrong. And I know I love you for giving me your eyes. For staying back and watching me shine. I know what I know. Now, I know you are on my side.

Getting Over It

I guess my mind still wonders and is hesitant over this whole thing. Can't really let go nor move on. Reminded constantly. Each day seems to be a battle over these strong emotions which is just overtaking me. Tried to walk with my head held up high, but I didn't really succeed. As I have said before its hard to take off these masks which I have learn to adapt with. Don't really know what are my exact expectations. At times its like I can hear the sound of silence calling. I wonder why? At times I cant hardly move or breathe. I guess this is all my imagination wondering wildly. Imagination getting wild. I'm astonished by certain words. My heart at times yearns for certain things which are just so hard to explain. No words can complete me. I guess I will always feel this way, til I know I'm complete. When the earth stands still and when I know the time is right. Til then I'm going to have to wait.

Surrender

To Surrender is to remain in silence - not only physically, but mentally.
It means bringing the mind to a state of non-reactivity by surrendering all desires.
In silence, one surrenders thoughts that lead to desire or wishful thinking for a particular outcome.
In all situations and circumstances, to surrender one's wish for a particular outcome, accepting what comes, and not seeking what does not come, is surrender.
This ultimately leads the mind to extinguish itself following the exhausting of all karmas. Surrender means to "let go" and to "allow" what ever is happening, to happen of its own accord, without any desire on your part to interfere or to change it or manipulate it into a desirable outcome.

Don't Be Fooled

Don't be fooled by the face I wear, for I wear a thousand masks, And none of them are me.
Don't be fooled, for goodness sake, don't be fooled.
I give you the impression that I'm secure, that confidence is my name and coolness is my game, And that I need no one.
But don't believe me. Beneath dwells the real me in confusion, in aloneness, in fear.
That's why I create a mask to hide behind, to shield me from the glance that knows.
But such a glance is precisely my salvation.
That is, if it's followed by acceptance, if it's followed by love.
It's the only thing that can liberate me from my own self-built prison walls.
I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing and that I'm just no good, And that you will reject me. And so begins the parade of masks. I idly chatter to you.
I tell you everything that's really nothing and nothing of what's everything, of what's crying within me.
Please listen carefully and try to hear what I'm not saying.
I'd really like to be genuine and spontaneous, and me. But you've got to help me. You've got to hold out your hand.
Each time you're kind and gentle, and encouraging,
Each time you try to understand because you really care, my heart begins to grow wings, feeble wings, but wings.
With your sensitivity and sympathy, and your power of understanding, you alone can release me from my shallow world of uncertainty.
It will not be easy for you. The nearer you approach me, the blinder I may strike back.
But I'm told that Love is stronger than strong walls,
And in this lies my only hope. Please try to beat down these walls with firm hands, but gentle hands, for a child is very sensitive.
Who am I, you wonder... I am every man you meet. I am every woman that you meet.
And I am also you. -- You cannot see a treasure at the bottom of a stormy and muddy lake though it is there.
Make the water still, and let the mud sink, and you see the treasure.
The treasure is there whether you see it or not.
So is happiness. It is always here, only covered and hidden. Happiness is here, within us.
Just calm?the mind and stay relaxed, and?we will experience it.
A calm and detached mind is the gate to true happiness.
The secret to discover this Happiness.

Tasteless

Last night while we was sleeping,
The ones who were sawing away at our heads,
Chopped of our hands,
Now we can no longer feed ourselves.
In our new predicament,(as you might imagine),
delicious and distasteful
have lost all meaning.
Instead, we are grateful for whatever comes to us.
Every morsel is served straight, blessed and frees our soul.