I swear I'm trying my very best to feel as free as I can. For just one second, without worries or someone to think about. Its painful that everything you thought you owned or you could depend on was just fake. I truly am giving up. I do not want to share anything with anyone. I just want the two most important people in my life to be happy and I guess seeing them happy would make me happy. I wish I could run away like right away. Have an adventure or just enjoy solitary for a while. I want to be able to smile without hesitating. Laugh without thinking. And trust without doubting. But sadly, I do not trust anything and anyone anymore. Just loosing it all. I'm just hoping I'd feel better real soon. Cause all this crying isn't helping at all.